SOMEONE

A lot of people has asked me who "Someone" is?

I dont know how to explain it and how to introduce him in this blog ...

I think im falling for him (Here we go again turismoboi, akala ko b nagbago ka na?, so impulsive)....

At first I wasnt aware of this attraction I felt for him, I thought I was just too interested and too intrigued, I thought I was just curious, I even told myself that this is just "libog". I thought that if I find another interesting guy, (thats why I tried to date other people) this attraction will die naturally, but recently I think it was getting stronger.

He was kind to me and the rest of the people as well. He was friendly or maybe too friendly, I dont know if we are really close or its just because thats what I want to think, and I really dont want to ask if he is close to me or not, but right now I could proudly tell he is now special but I dont want to hurt people.

A friend told me maybe it because he's just getting too friendly to me or maybe he was just a professional flirt after all everybody seems to have fallen for him not just me, my friend told me to be distant to him, I was trying to do that for days, but I gave up, I just cant help to be close to him even if its not right. My friend told me that he must be really a flirt or just maybe too attractive for me thats why I'm so eager to be with him.

"Hindi mo pa kasi natitikman, like what you always say libog lang yan"

but is it libog lang? I know by choice this feeling will pass, but I dont know, right now it is killing me, I kept on thinking about him (Here we go again turismoboi, ilang beses na ba narinig sakin yan sa blog) but I just cant help it, thats me, and its wrong, very very wrong.

I am very much aware that things wont work like what I want them to be, "Someone" is very much taken and very much in love with his significant other. I am just a stranger to this scene. I came late and Im sure ill just pass this relationship, maybe ill be the reason for the jealousy, ill be another trial or challenge to make their relationship stronger or maybe im just assuming too much.

"Someone" doesnt know that im feeling this, and I dont want him to have a hint. Im not going to tell this to him at all, not at this time or not even in a later time, its just too complicated to express this feeling especially now, im not sure how he will even react, he may just laugh, I dont even want to see his suprised, unexpected reaction. I will be a laughing stock of the couple and the people around us. There are lot of single persons out there? Im not sure why I'm attracted to this one? (TANGA!)

Recently he was giving signs that I think hes attracted to me as well (or maybe I thought there were signs but they are actually not) but I guess he is also now aware that the so called friendship we are building is going to a different direction if we allow it, I think he loves his significant other and he doesnt to hurt him again. I was kind of a witness on how he tried to fight for this relationship. Now that there is a calm water on their end, here I come storming around.

I have decided now to set a distance. I hardly text him or talk to him. I found as well a sign and an excuse last week to set more distance, he's smart I'm sure sooner or later he will realize that im doing this because I dont want to hurt anyone, I am helping him not to commit a mistake. I am helping myself to fall out of love or maybe not to fall in love at all. At this point, I believe this is just attraction but I really dont want this to progress to something.

Coincidentally, I was browsing Youtube when I found this new video of Avant and Nicole Scherzinger of the Pussycat Dolls, video was good but the message really hit me

Below are some of the lyrics and the youtube video, red portions of the song hit what I want to express, and the blue portions of the song are the ones I ambitiously want him to express.

Lie about us

"Baby I know when we started out there were things you didn't know, but babygirl we got a lotta things we
Need to discuss I know I'm asking for a lot, but just trust. you say that things gettin old sneakin'
Round creepin' and love on the low but baby girl I can't wait till' it's officially us, I can't wait to
Let them know about us.

First I thought that I could take you boy but I don't know, you told me you were gonna leave her for me Long ago.

Eventually I will but I just gotta take it slow don't wanna break her heart, altough I gotta let her go So baby ..

So please don't say you wanna give up.
How do I tell her that I'm falling in love,
And I know you're waiting patiently for that day
When we no longer have to lie about us.
Im with her all I want is your touch,
And when you call me I don't wanna hang up,
And I know I say it often but I can't wait
Till' we no longer have to lie about us.

Baby I know situation don't seem fair to us both.
But babygirl, she's an issue that I'm bout to adjust.
Don't mistake our love is meant for just us,
You are my soul, mind, body, spirit all that I know.
But babygirl I can't wait till' it's officially us,
I can't Wait to tell the world about us.



Moving forward, I dont want you to leave my blog with an impression that I want something to happen, I am hoping but Im not expecting.

I know where I stand. Enough said.

Maybe I'll just wait........... or maybe not.